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Mutiara Child LC http://mutiara.k-eduplex.net Wed, 30 May 2018 02:22:19 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.5.2 https://i0.wp.com/mutiara.k-eduplex.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/cropped-mutiara-logo2.png?fit=32%2C32 Mutiara Child LC http://mutiara.k-eduplex.net 32 32 142412180 Why Montessori for the Kindergarten Year? http://mutiara.k-eduplex.net/why-montessori-for-the-kindergarten-year/ Mon, 28 May 2018 07:00:06 +0000 http://mutiara.k-eduplex.net/?p=5199

Why Montessori for the Kindergarten Year?

By Tim Seldin, President of The Montessori Foundation, with Dr. Elisabeth Coe

So here are a few answers to some of the questions parents often ask about Montessori for the kindergarten child:

Q: What would be the most important advantages of keeping my five year old in Montessori?

Montessori is an approach to working with children that is carefully based on what we’ve learned about children’s cognitive, neurological, and emotional development. Although sometimes misunderstood, the Montessori approach has been acclaimed by some of America’s top experts on early childhood and elementary education as the most developmentally appropriate model currently available. One important advantage that Montessori offers the five year old has to do with how it helps the young child to “learn how to learn.”

Over recent years, educational research has increasingly shown that students in many schools don’t understand most of what they are being taught. Howard Gardner, Harvard psychologist and author of the best selling book The Unschooled Mind goes so far as to suggest that, “Many schools have fallen into a pattern of giving kids exercises and drills that result in their getting answers on tests that look like understanding. Most students, from as young as those in kindergarten to students in some of the finest colleges in America do not understand what they’ve studied, in the most basic sense of the term.

They lack the capacity to take knowledge learned in one setting and apply it appropriately in a different setting. Study after study has found that, by and large, even the best students in the best schools can’t do that.” (“On Teaching for Understanding. A Conversation with Howard Gardner.” By Ron Brandt. Educational Leadership Magazine. ASCD. 1994.)

Montessori is focused on teaching for understanding. In a primary classroom, three and four year olds receive the benefit of two years of sensorial preparation for academic skills by working with the concrete Montessori learning materials. This concrete sensorial experience gradually allows the child to form a mental picture of concepts like: How big is a thousand? How many hundreds make up a thousand? And What is really going on when we borrow or carry numbers in mathematical operations?

The value of the sensorial experiences that the younger children have had in Montessori have often been underestimated by both parents and educators. Research is very clear that young children learn by observing and manipulating their environment, not through textbooks and workbook exercises. The Montessori materials give the child concrete sensorial impressions of abstract concepts, such as long division, that become the foundation for a life-time of understanding.

Because Montessori teachers are well trained in child development, they know how to present information in developmentally appropriate ways.

In many, many American schools, children do exercises and fill in workbook pages with little understanding. There is a great deal of rote learning. Superficially, it may seem that these children are learning the material, however, all too often, a few months down the road, little of what they “learned” will be retained, and it will be rare for the children to be able to use their knowledge and skills in new situations. Learning to be organized and learning to be focused is as important as any academic work. Doing worksheets can be impressive to parents, but there is rarely any deep learning going on. More and more educational researchers are beginning to focus on whether students, young or adult, really understand or have simply memorized correct answers.

Q: In a class with such a wide age range of children, won’t my five year old spend the year taking care of younger children instead of doing his or her own work?

The five year old in Montessori classes often help the younger children with their work, actually teaching lessons or correcting errors.

Anyone who has ever had to teach a skill to someone else may recall that the very process of explaining a new concept, or helping someone practice a new skill leads the teacher to learn as much, if not more, than the pupil. This is supported by research. Experiences that facilitate development of Why Montessori for the Kindergarten Year? Tomorrow’s Child© Page 3 of 4 independence and autonomy are often very limited in traditional schools.

 Q: Isn’t it better for kids to go to school with the children from their neighborhood?

People used to buy a home and raise their family in the same neighborhood. There was a real sense of community. Today, the average family will move two or three times before their children go off to college. Many public schools expect a turnover of more than 20% of their population each year. The relationships that once bound families together into a community have grown weak. In many Montessori schools, families who live in different neighborhoods, but who share similar values, have come together to create and enjoy the extended community of their school. Children growing up in Montessori schools often speak of how closely knit their friendships were with their schoolmates and their families.

 Q: Since most children will eventually have to go to the neighborhood schools, wouldn’t it be better for them to make the transition in kindergarten rather than in first grade?

The American Montessori Society tells of one father who wrote, “We considered the school years ahead. We realized a child usually does his best if he has good learning habits, a sound basis in numbers and math, and the ability to read. We realized that he has had an excellent two-year start in his Montessori school. If he were to transfer now to another kindergarten program, he would probably go no further than he is now; whereas if he stays in Montessori, he will reap the benefits of his past work under the enthusiastic guidance of teachers who will share his joy of learning.”

By the end of the kindergarten year, Montessori students will often have developed academic skills that may be beyond those of children enrolled in most American kindergarten programs. However, parents should remember that academic progress is not our ultimate goal. Our real hope is that the children will have an incredible sense of selfconfidence, enthusiasm for learning, and feelings of being closely bonded to their teachers and classmates. We want them to honestly enjoy school and feel good about themselves as students.

Once children have developed a high degree of self-confidence, independence, and enthusiasm for learning, they normally can adapt to all sorts of new situations. While there are wonderful and exciting reasons to keep a child in Montessori through elementary school and beyond, by the time they are in first grade, they will typically be able to go off to their new school with not only a vibrant curiosity, but also an excitement about making new friends and learning new things.

Q: If I keep my child in Montessori for kindergarten, won’t he/she be bored in a traditional first grade?

Montessori children by age five are normally curious, self-confident learners who look forward to going to school. They are engaged, enthusiastic learners who honestly want to learn and ask excellent questions.

What teacher wouldn’t give her left arm for a room filled with children like that? Well, truthfully, over the years we’ve found some who consider these children “disruptive.”

Disruptive? You ask. A polite, independent Montessori child disruptive? Well, first off, let’s remember that Montessori children are human beings, and not all children who attended Montessori fit the idealized description; however, enough do that the generalization is often fairly accurate.

Montessori children by age six have spent three or four years in a school where they were treated with honesty and respect. While there were clear expectations and ground rules, within that framework, their opinions and questions were taken quite seriously. Unfortunately, there are still some teachers and schools where children who ask questions are seen as challenging authority. You can imagine an independent Montessori child asking his new teacher, but why do I have to ask each time I need to use the bathroom? Or why do I have to stop my work right now?

So the honest answer is that it depends on the teacher and the school.

From and academic viewpoint, Montessori kindergarteners will generally be doing very well by the end of the school year, although, once again, that is not our ultimate objective. The program offers them enriched lessons in math, reading, language, and a wide range of lessons in science, geography, and other cultural areas. If they are ready, they will normally develop excellent skills and become quite “culturally literate.”

When one of these children enters a traditional first grade, they may have already mastered the skills that their new school considered first grade curriculum. Some Montessori children are still more advanced. Once upon a time in America, elementary schools had only one course of study for every child at each grade level, and the only option for children who were academically gifted was to skip them ahead one or two grade levels. This created all sorts of resentments and social stresses on children who socially and physically still belonged with their own age group. However, as Dr. Montessori’s educational strategies have been incorporated by more school systems, it is becoming more common to find elementary schools that are willing and able to adapt their curriculum to meet the needs of individual students who are ready for accelerated work.

The key concept in Montessori is the child’s interest and readiness for advanced work. If a child is not developmentally ready to go on, she is not left behind or made to feel like a failure. Our goal is not to ensure that our children develop at a predetermined rate, but to ensure that whatever they do, they do well. Most Montessori children master a tremendous amount of information and skills. Even in the rare case where one of our children may not have made as much progress as we would have wished, she will usually be moving along steadily at her own pace and will feel good about herself as a learner.

¨ Dr. Elisabeth Coe is the Past President of the American Montessori Society and Director of the Houston Montessori Center in Houston, TX. Tim Seldin is the President of the Montessori Foundation and co-author of Celebrations of Life and The World in the Palm of Her Hand. This article appeared in Tomorrow’s Child.

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Helping Toddlers Resolve Conflicts http://mutiara.k-eduplex.net/helping-toddlers-resolve-conflicts/ Mon, 28 May 2018 02:53:10 +0000 http://mutiara.k-eduplex.net/?p=5182

Conflict resolution is an art rather than a science, because each situation presents so many unique variables. Each individual’s temperament, perceptions, baggage, etc. all come into play. Should we hash it out? Insist? Give in? Or just walk away? There’s no one-size-fits-all approach.

So we can all use as much practice as we can get, especially young children. Beyond exposing our children to everyday social situations — play dates and trips to the park — how can we help children learn to manage and resolve conflict?

In short, by allowing them to experience it with our support. Providing this support means learning when and how to intervene. Here are some of my intervention do’s and don’ts:

1Don’t resolve conflicts for them

It’s a big challenge to let go of our adult wish to tie a neat bow around our children’s disagreements and avoid their emotional outbursts. But our interventions can prevent children from learning much of anything other than that they are dependent on us to fix these situations, incapable of handling conflicts themselves.

Resolving it for them includes demanding that toddlers share or take turns, as well as offering ideas and suggestions like, “How about you both hold onto the pail and carry it together? There you go!”

The challenge for parents is to allow children to safely engage in conflict and resolve it their way, rather than letting our discomfort or impatience get the better of us. The more we say and do for our children in these situations, the less they will learn to handle themselves. Trust and patience must precede learning.

2. Don’t neglect to protect

Some misinterpret “respectful discipline” as simply telling children not to hit, bite, etc., rather than physically intervening. Children need both. They need us to be ready to prevent these harmful behaviors if possible, blocking or holding children’s hands and calmly shadowing children who have demonstrated these behaviors in the past (or seem in an out-of-sorts mood that day).

3. Don’t shame or lecture by pointing out the obvious

One of our goals should be to help children build confidence to deal with conflicts, but much of the expert advice commonly given strips confidence away. A friend shared this exchange she’d had with her toddler’s prospective teacher:

When I asked what the teacher does when there’s conflict, she said something along these lines of, “I show the child – look at John’s face, he is hurt, do you see how he looks? Do you see how your actions hurt John?”

As I told my friend, this type of response is one of my pet peeves. It’s heavy-handed, shaming and underestimates our children’s awareness. Kids are even more sensitive than we are, and beginning at birth it is next to impossible for them not to register the feelings of those around them. Hitting or pushing has much less to do with “John”, much more to do with what’s going on inside the “perpetrator”. Generally, these are momentary impulses beyond a young child’s control, and our job is to help toddlers with these impulses, not rub their noses in the consequences of their actions.

4. Don’t speak in exclamation points, use an angry tone or expression

Again, this creates shame, erodes confidence and fuels the undesirable behavior by giving it negative attention.

5. Don’t take sides

Taking sides creates “bad guys” and “helpless victims”.

Which brings me to the do’s

1. Make “remain neutral” your mantra

2. Acknowledge both sides (sportscasting)

3. Protect children by preventing hitting, pushing or repetitive toy taking calmly and confidently, and shadow a child who seems to be having a difficult day.

If children seem to be caught in a pattern of hitting, biting, pushing (or other limit-pushing behavior), they need our help and protection, not our scolding.  They might be:

  • Tired
  • Hungry
  • Seeking the firm limits they are not getting at home
  • Angry, frustrated, overwhelmed
  • Releasing stress
  • Feeling over-excited, overstimulated, out of control

If we don’t catch the behavior in time to prevent it, firmly and matter-of-factly remind the child, “You want that toy, but I won’t let you hit” or “I don’t want you to hit.” Leave it at that.

4. Let infants and toddlers take toys, because this is on their short list of “playing together” possibilities.  Only intervene to protect an older toddler’s more elaborate projects or when a child seems stuck in a pattern of toy taking. (For more on this, please read What to Do About A Toddler Toy Taker.)

5Keep an open mind – This means allowing children to do it their way, which will be different from our way most of the time. Trust is our biggest challenge.

6. Wait rather than putting a time limit on conflict, even if it seems intense. If no one’s getting hurt, it is healthy for children to release these feelings.

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Gives the children a way to work things out http://mutiara.k-eduplex.net/gives-the-children-a-way-to-work-things-out/ Sun, 27 Mar 2016 09:31:57 +0000 http://smartyschool.stylemixthemes.com/?p=104

Most of the conflict in our home doesn’t come from children just fighting – usually it’s because they have difficulty making a decision together and have difficulty finding agreement. 

 

Problem solving techniques I have given my children include;

  • one person speaks at a time
  • speak to each other how you would like to be spoken to – no raised voices or angry faces
  • stick it out/persevere – don’t walk away upset, work on it until the issue is resolved
  • stay calm – try to control your emotions and tears so that you can continue to communicate
  • try to see the other child’s point of view
  • consider taking turns
  • be prepared to try something new
  • be prepared to compromise
  • try to suggest new ideas
  • try to give suggestions, options and choice to the other child
  • be prepared to apologise if you have made a mistake or hurt someone
  • be patient, gracious, generous and kind

Some of these concepts are directed more at Caspar. As the older child I have an expectation that he will take the lead with problem solving and conflict resolution. It turns out he can be quite persuasive with his brother once he calms down enough to think things through. 

When I have two children in tears or when the two of them just cannot agree I will do something which is reminiscent of the peace table.

I have the children face each other and hold hands. I ask for them one at at time to explain the problem and for his point of view (we usually start with Otis – being the youngest he has less impulse control). After each child has spoken I might make a suggestion, give some ideas. As much as I can I prompt them to resolve the issue between themselves. Sometimes I will ask ‘Caspar/Otis do you have any ideas on how we can resolve this’ or ‘Is it possible for you to …(go halves, take turns)’. Sometimes I  am just silent – this creates space for them to think and take their time. 

Usually when both of them have had the opportunity to clearly articulate their concerns they feel like the have been listened to and they have calmed down. Often the way to resolve the issue is clear. 

I recently used this in a busy cafe and it de-escalated the situation immediately. I went from two children with quivering lips (about to burst into tears) to two children talking to each other. Yes it needs facilitation from an adult but it’s a way that everyone has the opportunity to express themselves and to be heard. It may not work with two three year olds but with our mixed age group it gives the children a way to work things out. 

Tim Seldin writes about the Peace Table (as below). I love the idea of children have a structure to resolve their problems. Sitting down, hand on heart, taking turns at talking and ringing the bell to signify agreement. Once again this technique would de-escalate the situation and allow everyone to express themselves. Sitting down as table may also help as it physically removes the children from the place of conflict. 

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